LYNN HAVEN — Tears formed in Carol Durham’s eyes Saturday as she described how she would have missed witnessing her grandson’s accomplishments if she had committed suicide more than 20 years ago, when she spent 240 days in the hospital struggling with mental illness.
During hospital admissions between 1992 and 1994, Durham was treated for panic and anxiety disorders, chronic depression and post traumatic stress syndrome as a result of being severely abused as a child, she said.
“When I was in the hospital, I was on suicide watch almost every single one of those 240 days, where someone sat and watched me because I didn’t want to live … . Now I love life,” she said.
At a luncheon Saturday, the Bay County branch of the National Organization for Women honored Durham as their 2014 Woman of the Year for her work as a “dedicated advocate” for those suffering from mental illnesses.
Durham’s experiences with her own mental illnesses led her to begin counseling others. Today, she is a certified recovery peer specialist and, through the National Alliance for Mental Illness and the Life Management Center, counsels many who are going through trials she has been through herself. More than one of her friends noted that they were certain Durham has saved lives.
“I want to pay it forward. I want other people to be able to have someone in their lives that says, ‘I’m hanging with you. We’re going to battle this together,’ ” Durham said of her motivation.
Diagnosed with kidney cancer last year, Durham found herself showered with affection by clients, co-workers and friends.
“All of these people that I have been working with came back to support me,” she said.
Durham is cancer-free now. She is active in her church and continues to work to heighten awareness and remove the stigma of mental illness.
“There’s nothing worse than to be battling something you don’t understand and then to be ostracized from the world so that you have nowhere to reach out,” she said.
Many of Durham’s friends spoke before the guests at the luncheon of Durham’s dedication, strength and kindness, including Bradbury, NOW president Margaret McKinney and others.
“If she ever calls you a friend, you are a friend for life,” said Durham’s pastor, Margaret Henkle.
“It’s the experiences she’s had that make her such a great counselor because she knows what the rest of us are going through … ,” said Durham’s partner Beth Dixon. “You picked the right person.”